Hop, Panic, Jump 2012

For people like me, the idea of running as fast as you can and then jumping into a sand pit sounds like a waste of time but some people have chosen a life dedicated to this kind of thing in the attempt to beat someone else at it. Gone are the days when ‘sports’ involved men and women being pitted against wild animals and or barbarians, we now have dexterous games and rolling about on a mat. A collection of these kind of saps are called ‘Olympians’ and in case you have avoided media better than even myself, the Olympic games are coming to this country.

“Number two, fetch my propeller attachment”

The screams of the people involved with the Olympics comity were quite unnerving, when the votes came through it was deemed that London was to hold the 2012 hop, skip and jump. Though something tells me it is a lot more than just pride in hosting the games. I remember sports day back in primary school and dull it all was too. I was instructed to line up against my fellow class mates and run like my life depended on it to the end of the track, in an attempt to win, what did you win? Nothing, nothing but exhaustion.

On the first couple of runs it was quite exciting but it quickly becomes clear some children have the right genetics and you’re never going to compete. I decided that was that and made it clear that I wasn’t competing again…I was made to feel terrible for not wanting to join in with P.E (Physical education) but I found it tedious having to run fast or throw something against someone who really believed they were achieving something.

The Olympics is big news though and literally an entire mini world has been built in the centre of London to accommodate the games, all this means for me is that I will probably never want to visit London again but apparently some people dislike the games so much, they are willing to blow it up…or so that’s the kind of impression I get from a peek at some news coverage.

From an article in the Guardian ‘Around 13,500 troops will be deployed at the London 2012 Olympics, more than are ­currently at war in Afghanistan’. In translation‘Government to arm 13,500 low achieving teenagers with automatic weapons and set them loose on the streets’

It’s for Britain innit

It’s quite a statement, the troops aren’t joining in though, they are going to be there to protect. Protect what? you say…well I’m not entirely sure. I mean yes, I won’t be cheering on Great Britain in the hope they win a partially gold medal but I don’t have the level of resentment for the games that I’d want to kill people. The government claim security measures have been put in place for the good of the people during the games…yeah just like Beijing 2008 right?

The £11 billion sports day is symbolised with a logo that looks as if it were made from potato prints and couple of mascots who were obviously chosen to signify just how ‘out of this world’ the cost of the games will be, which you can now buy in a metropolitan police outfit for about a tenner. (Baton and tear gas not included)

Gay one eyed aliens eat mars bars and drink Lucozade

All of this comes during the news our government decided the national health service had to go, fuel is about a pound for a splash, more people find themselves homeless and generally everything else you can think of is suffering cut backs.

Thinking about how much £11 billion would help out with in this country is quite mind-boggling, the games initially were predicted to take a measly £2.37 billion, which that figure alone could have re-opened every day care centre and pay for meals on wheels for all of our old folk, which have been struggling to stay afloat during the insane tax hikes. £11 billion is just fucking disgusting and if you disagree you’re either a ticket holder or a berk.

I’d pay good money to see Gladiators back on the telly.

The combined IQ of a grape

Nothing could be more exciting than watching 150lb Eric Reynolds from Swansea, as his mum, wife and child watch him being beaten with a gauntlet stick by a 250lb steroid monster called ‘Rhino’. That’s entertainment. Whether it’s to invest in more advanced stems cell research where we create huge gladiators in lab’s, or we give young offenders a chance to win back their freedom…it would be a damn sight more moral than the 2012 games.

Olympians this year are backed by all the great sporting influences, Coca Cola, MacDonald’s, Cadbury’s…the list goes on of body enhancing foods that support the games, it’s as ridiculous as it sounds. Maccy D’s is hopeful that it can break a world record too, with what they see as the largest burger diner ever, slap bang in the middle of east London. The negative implications of the games far outweighs the good that it will do for London and it’s not just London that will be effected, I heard on the grapevine that London require a large portion of my local police force too, so I guess we’ll be expecting more break-in’s in my area and dirty faced kids burning bins looking miserable.

The rich want to live in fortresses and I guess, who can fucking blame them. In the near future expect to be observed and then detained for speaking against ludicrous events like this and become a marked man in society. The Olympic games shouldn’t bring fear to the people of London, for those who are switched on, they can cope and adjust, for those who don’t see it coming, it’ll be like shooting fish in a barrel. In regard’s the security changes in London, there’s too many to mention here, surprisingly it also lands around the same time as our beloved Elizabeth celebrates 60 years of Nazi rule over us proles, after dropping her signature on the bill that killed our free health service this year. We’re all expected to sit back now and watch the fireworks, the army and the “musicians” mince about proclaiming life is just peachy under Liz’s sword.

I’ll be out of the country whilst all of this is going on, if you have any sense you won’t be on the streets of London, or watching some retrospective guff on TV about the Queen, backed by Adele’s melancholy piano tracks for the working class. This window of opportunity for security firms is huge and unstoppable, so don’t bother marching or camping, a tsunami of surveillance is coming and they’re not even being subtle about it.

From the millions spent on a ‘mock’ terrorist attack, together with hundreds of service men and women “just in case” something catastrophic happens. To the obvious Zionist visual hints all over the capital. It brings to mind events of the past like The military siege of Heathrow airport in January 1974 was said to have been a dress-rehearsal for a military coup, we got Thatcher instead so it’s debatable what would have been the preferred result.

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